This evening, my mom went upstairs to pick up DD after she woke up from her nap. Over the monitor, I could hear DD crying angrily and I noticed she didn’t stop even after my mom picked her up. She cried the entire way downstairs until I held her in my arms. She stopped crying almost immediately.

My mom is positive that DD knows that I am her mommy – and that is why she was so angry when my mom picked her up. DD was expecting me and instead, she got her Ah-Ma. That made me hug DD tighter and then all I could think of was all the babies in the world whose cries for their mamas go unanswered (for some reason or another) and then I started to cry.

I pray for all the orphaned, abandoned, abused, and forgotten babies in the world. May God have mercy upon them and shower them with love in some capacity. May my children NEVER have to go through the same. Just the thought of it makes me want to weep all over again. The fear that courses through my veins and the desperate clinging to the hope that God will not put my children through this particular suffering. That I will grow old and watch my children grow old and have children of their own.

God, I believe, help my unbelief. Have mercy on my family.

Happy Valentine’s Day. Go hug your babies if you have them. Go hold your loved ones tightly.

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