Once again, I snooped in my mother’s email to see if she’d been chatting with my dad. *sigh* After a month or so of inactivity, they had quite a few conversations lately. I don’t know exactly what compels me to find out. Clearly, I am not over my dad and still want to know what’s going on with him. Their conversations are unbearably sad. My dad is full of self-pity and delusion. My mother is sad and reaching out and kind.

Part of me feels bad that I am very obviously violating my mother’s privacy (I don’t really care if I’m violating my dad’s). Part of me is fascinated and can’t wait to find out more. But mostly, I am just sad. 😦

I will do all I can to make sure I do not go through this with DH. Plus, I will do all I can in my power to ensure my kids don’t have to go through this either.

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