Rants


Seriously. I just don’t know how I would be able to deal with a country and people who remind me day in and day out that I am not welcome here – so unwelcome that I will be shot for walking down the fucking street.

RIP Trayvon Martin. May God comfort and bring peace to your family.

Clearly, I am the mayor of this establishment. Last night, right before midnight, I became absolutely obsessed with finding out when my infant car seat expired. Then, I got annoyed that my infant car seat expires in 12/2014. It won’t affect baby #3, but that means I will likely have to buy a new one for baby #4. Or scrounge around friends and see if their old car seats are not expiring until end of 2015 or mid 2016.

So what did I do? I spent over half an hour researching infant car seats for a hypothetical problem for a hypothetical baby when my THIRD child is as yet, UNBORN. WTF is wrong with me, besides the obvious?

Carry on, normal people. 

Sorry I’m a day late. 😦 DH had my laptop on a business trip so I couldn’t post.

I’m annoyed at myself because I finally found 2 CDs full of wedding pics that I didn’t include in my wedding album. The pics aren’t the end of the world – but it did have people that I would’ve liked to include in the album. Pics of friends and family friends that made the trip to see us. I can’t decide whether or not to order another book with extra pages added in, or just to suck it up and get over it. 😦 After all, *I* know they were there. Is it really worth another $40 and having an “extra” wedding book? Poop. 😦

What do you guys think?

Seriously, I have too many of these stories just lurking in the back of my brain that if I don’t get them down soon, I will forget them.

1) One time, DD accidentally hit my stomach but DS thought she hit my breast. He said, “Mama, DD hit you in the milk!”

2) DD keeps trying to jump but unsuccessfully. It’s really cute though because she gets on her tip-toes and raises her hands in the air. Then she whooshes her hands and arms down trying to “push off” or take off the ground. heehee.

3) Last week, I had a total parenting fail moment when DS insisted on staying in his PJs and his pullup and refused to get dressed for school. I must’ve spent at least 20 minutes spanking him or wrestling with him. (Let me just tell you, a 3.5 year old who kicks and screams is really hard to dress – even if your husband is helping. We did not win.) He ended up going to school in his PJs. DH changed him at school. I was beyond pissed.

4) Lately, DD is obsessed with her doll. She feeds her, changers her diapers, gives her naps, makes her play the piano. She even gives the doll time outs! Then she hugs the “baby.” heehee. Well, I had texted DH’s brother the pictures and he had to ruin it by saying, “She’s becoming a little girl!” Because you know, girls only play with dolls. Not trains or anything else. FFS. I realize that he meant well, but seriously? That’s just fucking stupid.

5) DD had been saying, “Jajija” or “Jija” for vagina. Recently, it morphed into, “Gina.” Super cute. I don’t know what it is about kids saying the correct names for genitalia – it is HILARIOUS.

6) Now, part of our bedtime ritual is for the kids to talk to (but mostly blow raspberries on my tummy) their little brother. DS2 REALLY loves to respond to his big brother and sister. As soon as they start up, he rolls and kicks and does all manner of wizardry. The kids love to put their hands on my tummy and feel DS2 doing his stuff. So cute.

7) DS likes to quiz me on all the Thomas the Trains and the different engines and to see which tender belongs to which engine. He thinks it’s hilarious when I’m wrong. (That’s his idea of a joke – to have wrong answers.)

8) A few weeks ago, I broke another toilet seat. This is the 3rd toilet seat we’ve broken (I broke the first, DH broke the second, I broke the third) in a year. I mentioned this on FB and a HS acquaintance said that he always thought I had a “big booty” but “dayum!” Seriously, I almost decked him. (Well, figuratively.) I just hate it when people try and so fail to be funny. I would be mildly offended if it were remotely true, but I barely hit puberty in HS – I certainly didn’t have any junk in the trunk. But seriously? Who says that to a 7 month pregnant woman? ONLY AN ASSHOLE.

9) DD has been a holy terror these past few weeks. She throws tantrums and screams and is totally defiant. I just have to remember that DS went through this phase around this age as well. It’s just that he could barely talk so we didn’t know EXACTLY what was on his mind. We have no such problem with DD.

Nothing like looking at a first time parent’s baby registry to make you feel smug and superior. Seriously – socks for a baby born in June in LA? Or newborn specific bath towels? REALLY? *sigh*

When I was registering for my first kid, I made my friend who had a baby a year ahead of me do my registry. That way, I was more assured of not having useless or wasted items on my list. As it happened, I still bought plenty of crap that didn’t need to be purchased. (I’m looking at you, bottle warmer!) I think it upsets me because I know every one has a limited budget and money supply for new babies. Why would you want to waste your money on crap that will just clutter your house as well as not use?

BLARGH. I know. I’m just a crotchety, smug, asshat.

Sometimes, I really hate Facebook memes. “Parents need to fill a child’s bucket of self esteem so high that the rest of the world can’t poke enough holes to drain it dry.” – Alvin Price

Really?! That is a crock of shit. Part of my job as a parent is to make my kids competent so their self-esteem is based in REALITY. Otherwise, you just have delusional and useless people.

FFS. I just want to punch the person who posted this in the face.

A few weeks ago, DD decided to climb out of her crib. She thwopped down onto the floor and I ran upstairs in a panic, opening the door, totally forgetting that she was likely right by the door to open it, and of course, bonked her on the head. She was more injured from my inept door handling than from the fall. I thought I could get away with not converting the crib to the toddler bed, but a few mornings later, when I was too slow in getting her one morning, I found her with her foot over the railing, trying to climb out again. *sigh* So I had to convert the bed.

Ever since the bed conversion, DD has been a NIGHTMARE. She will scream her brains out and refuse to sleep. (When before, she would just lay down quietly and go to bed.) She’ll scream at the gate by the door and throw herself onto the floor. At night, she will usually do that a minute or so, then run to her bed and go to sleep. But then she’ll wake up at 3-4am and REFUSE TO GO BACK TO SLEEP. She has climbed onto the big comfy chair we have in her room and sleep there (she fell off in the morning).

Unfortunately, DD is too smart. She will take the nursing pillow and drag it to the gate and stand on top of it as a step stool to see if she can get out. When I removed the pillow, she found ANOTHER pillow. I am just waiting for her to figure out she can move the footrest we have by her bed (so she climb up on it) and pile a pillow on top of that.

Plus, she doesn’t nap well anymore either. As soon as I put her down and let go, I realize she is still HOLDING ONTO ME WITH HER DEATH GRIP. Then she’ll scream her brains out for a LONG time. *sigh* It is horrible. She only naps when I successfully transfer her sleeping body from the car to her room. (That is, unless DS doesn’t completely fuck it up for me by WAKING HER UP.)

The other night, after having no nap that day, she woke up after sleeping only an hour and a half. She was screaming her brains out like she was in PAIN. So, I took her to my room thinking that she’d calm down. NO. She was screaming her brains out on my bed (and not waking up DS at all). The only way she would stop was if I picked her up and walked around or rocked her. Seriously. I was rocking a 23lb “newborn” to sleep. I was NOT happy.

Plus, since we are on a family trip, her sleep is going to be all messed up. And then we’ll be leaving again in May so just as soon as I get her back to normal, we’re gonna screw it up again. Poop.

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